Today our favorite 20-something-year-old spitter, J. Cole, drops his hella anticipated, gleaming debut Cole World: The Sideline Story (cop a copy!) and we’re toasting to our boy’s well-earned spoon of success. The chicks of WWMD are loyal Cole cheerleaders not only ’cause dude’s a nice guy with a mean flow, but because he’s forever dishing out an array of no-chaser gems centered on the politics of love and lust. Need the scoop? Just peep all the lessons on sex, devotion and heartbreak we learned from spinning his first disc. Tell your boyfriend he can thank us later…
Love Lesson #1: Lose the ego when your man has a sustainable dream (that includes you)
Rhyme of Reason: ”My goal this year is a real one, gonna stack a million/And as soon as I do, mama that 9 to 5 is through/And I know I ain’t been callin’, but I’m thinkin’ bout you/And all the shit that you been through/My girl and then my brother too” — “Dollar And A Dream III”
Love Lesson #2: Fellatio is the quickest route to forgiveness…
Rhyme of Reason: “Never fuss or fight, on the grind tryna find this lettuce/I love it when you give me head, I hate it when you give me headaches”— “Can’t Get Enough”
Love Lesson #3: …However fellatio is not the quickest route to his heart.
Rhyme of Reason: “I had this little bad thing somethin’ like them 10′s/She gave a nigga mad brain somethin’ like the wiz/But you see the sad thing fuckin’ with her is/Is the chick ain’t even have brains dummy like a bitch” — “Lights Please”
Love Lesson #4: Only you can decide what’s tolerable enough to stay down.
Rhyme of Reason: “Back when Martin King had a thing for Coretta/Wonder if she seen all the dreams he was dreamin’/Did she have a clue of all the schemes he was schemin’/Still loved him just enough to put up with the cheatin’/Months go by and only see him for a weekend/I say a prayer, hope my girl ain’t leavin’”— “Sideline Story”
Love Lesson #5: Maximize your time with dude.
Rhyme of Reason: “They say time is money, but really it’s not/If we ever go broke girl, than time is all we got/And you can’t make that back, no you can make that back so/Let’s ball while we here” — “Mr. Nice Watch”
Love Lesson #6: Start stacking up on some late-to-work excuses
Rhyme of Reason: “And you know just what I’m talking about, tomorrow you’ll be calling out/Cause tonight we getting right into the wee morn’/Cooking nigga breakfast after sex is like a reward/Then I go my way and you think about me all day, thats just a warning” — “In The Morning”
Love Lesson #7: Make him pay for tomorrow’s hair appointment.
Rhyme of Reason: “I’m handin’ diamonds and pearls and vandalizin’ her curls/
Sweating her weave out, moans as she breathes out” — “Nobody’s Perfect”
Love Lesson #8: Understand why some men cheat.
Rhyme of Reason: See I could probably rush you, tell you that he should have loved you/Take advantage, fuck you, tell you I’ll do all the shit he wouldn’t do/But the truth is, we all the same, on different teams, but it’s all a game/The objective, tryna to score, you gotta wife, you find a whore/You fuck her fast, she find her drawers, pull up her pants, you find the Door/You drive her home, she mop you off, you bust again, and drop her off” — “Never Told”
Love Lesson #9: If you’re going to play a good dude, make sure your life (and looks) stay on point.
Rhyme of Reason: “This is for the bitches that played me, what up ho?/Nah I ain’t mad, it’s sad, you went from bad to real bad/Two kids that don’t even know their real dad/Real sad, baby girl I wish you still had it/Then maybe you could get a taste of livin’ Villematic”— “Rise and Shine”
Love Lesson #10: Real dudes don’t ever (ever) hit women.
Rhyme of Reason: “Ex-cheerleader, hollerin’ what’s up/Now her ni–a beat her, now that’s fucked up/What type of little fuck boy hit a Woman/ bet he wouldn’t put his hands on a ni–a” — “God’s Gift”
Love Lesson #11: Loyalty trumps all.
Rhyme of Reason: “Cause she been lonely, she ain’t felt a man in 7 seasons/Damn! She do the best that she can/Her mama telling her to find another man/She college educated with a felon boyfriend/That’s what she thinking tonight/Maybe she’s right, but please stay down mama” — “Breakdown”
Love Lesson #12: Breaking up never gets easier.
Rhyme of Reason: “Let me know if I’m out of bounds, are the lines the same?/I mean ya, lookin’ good, yeah you still got it/Been reminiscin’ and I’m not sure how I feel about it/Now we can say that all good things come to an end/But we know each other way too well to pretend/We went from friends to somethin’ much more/To breakin’ up to makin’ up and fuckin’ once more/Second chances, we gave enough to finally/We gave it up, but some days I be wakin’ up and wantin’ one more” — “Nothing Lasts Forever”
Love Lesson #13: Just because he understands your problem doesn’t mean he still won’t take advantage of it.
Rhyme of Reason: “Can I get a witness, this is Sade mixed with Shawty Lo/Ey Jezebel, why you be up in every party for?/You lost and lookin for a savior, I ain’t Mario/I got no cape, but I can’t wait to give you cardio/Work you out, you call me daddy, ain’t my daughter though/Make me wonder where your father go?” — “Daddy’s Little Girl”
Love Lesson #14: Don’t confuse his intentions with your intentions.
Rhyme of Reason: “Hey, we got a good thing/Don’t know if I’mma see you again/But is that a good thing?/Cause girl I can’t be your man, no ma’am/I know what’s on your brain/You’re probably hopin’ never would end/Like is it the real thing/Or is it just a one night stand” —”Work Out”
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