It happens to the best of us. And I literally mean it, the BEST of us. At the very least, it’s an aggy brainstorm; at the very most, a rampaging neurosis. But no matter where your stranded frustrations nestle on the “Why Did He Cheat?” spectrum, they tend to end up in a place we women often clumsily misplace, internally. Maybe it’s our own pushy maternalism, but the shock of bad news often turns us into wonder women: We wonder what we could have done different or wonder where we went wrong. Unfortunately no cape for this gig, just a healthy heap of mental terrorism that feels like a cooka kick to the quintessential GF — after all those kegle crunches, keen attention to his wants, and shotgun loyalty, his eye and erection still wandered. Aint that a bitch?
Unfortunately Sugar, there’s no quick fix to rehab a philandering phallus (biology and patriarchy are a bit too bulky for this blog). However, there is a little preventive pill we can swallow (yup, yet another) to help calm those nerves before they ignite into a fineable offense. You ready for it?
It’s not about you.
I know it’s hard to digest the fact that a GF can be an irrelevant non-effin-factor when talking about a BF’s sexual prowess, but unless he’s reacting in a sinsiter payback plot, I pinky swear it’s true. Peep the candid testimonies of eight credible co-signers:
8.) “I cheated when I went after this girl I used to work with. I knew she was a freak. My girlfriend at the time wasn’t really kinky and I was okay with that, but I wanted to know what someone like my co-worker would be like. Men like options.” –Kevin, 28
7.) “Even though I wanted to marry her, I felt in my heart that I needed to experience everything I want with other women before completely settling down. Nothing to do with the relationship, she was more than any man can ask for, it was personal. When you don’t come from a church background, or married parents, being faithful is not something your used to seeing or doing.” –Seven, 26
6.) “I don’t know, I did it because I’m a piece of shit. Sex means nothing. I understand most women do it because they may be lacking something in their relationships but us guys we just do it just to do it. It’s not like there was anything wrong with my girl, it’s just that she’s cute too! Women are always thinking there’s something wrong with them but it’s not. It’s us, it’s in our nature. It’s just sex.” –Keith, 29
5.) “The majority of men cheat just to cheat. Sorry but the only thing better than good pussy is new pussy.” –Alex, 27
4.) “First off it was selfish of me to cheat and to be dishonest. It was never to hurt her, I just wanted to simply have my cake and eat it too. It wasn’t so much about the sex. It was more about the commitment and me not being ready for it. There was really nothing she did wrong or could’ve done to prevent it.” –Bolaji, 25
3.) “When I got with my ex it was a real ego boost. She was the baddest chick I ever bagged! After her I wanted to test the waters and see what else my net worth could bring in! It’s a dickhead move, I know but some people are always going to wonder about more even when they have enough. Ambitious I guess?” –Lawrence, 26
2.) “I was horny and around somebody at the time that was down to help me with that. Nothing more, nothing less. Girls get so upset and get insecure anytime a guy gets a little greedy. They don’t even have to. We can still have freal feelings for our girls still go out and and cheat.” –Nick, 29
1.) “Women don’t get it. Men are ALWAYS envisioning what sex would be like with different women. It’s not even something we can really control. Like women when they see another girl the first thing they check are her shoes or her outfit, things like that. Men wonder what she looks like bent over. Period. So if given the sexual opportunity, we’re going to act on our curiosity.” –Jeremiah, 25
Now results may vary. Not all guys are as honest and genuine as the ones WWMD keeps tucked in our entourage. Some dudes try to throw blame at their own GFs for motivating the cheat. And although every case has its own valid evidence, displacing blame of personal irresponsibility is a juvenile move reserved for cookie thieving kids, not for the grown ass. At the end of the day, it’s all projection. If he’s not retaliating with an ulterior motive, he’s more than likely acting on his own yearnings festering or firing inside, unfortunately for GF his instincts breach contract. Sorry mistresses, guess this means you were more available than specially selected As for GFs: Save yourself the reckless mind-wrack and resist the urge to poke and prod at yourself in blame. Afterall, he’s the one who needs the self-critique.
What were some of the reasons you had to cheat? Was your partner ever the cause of it? Was there anything that could be done to prevent it or was it lust on a muck? Clean out your closet at @wwmdtv
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