The Major Benefits of Befriending Your Man’s Ex

Posted by By Tracy at 22 June, at 12 : 58 PM Print

The Major Benefits of Befriending Your Man’s Ex

No one likes to be reminded that once upon a time your lover-to-date was tonguing down, feeling up and nuzzling along a navel not belonging to you. Oh, and loving that woman. Hard. That forever-and-ever-I-love-everything-about-you hard. The thought, if lingered on enough, can definitely chafe your ego and drizzle poison onto your relationship. But the word exgirlfriend shouldn’t be synonymous with the word enemy. To me, that’ll only put you in attack mode, butch girl. Why? Because our personal joy isn’t dependent on what does and doesn’t happen in our life, but the MEANING we douse those circumstances in. Which then gives our nervous system an association (of our choice) to always lean on. Stay woke.

Now on to some pop culture references… it appears that Breezy’s PYT, Karrueche is handling her man’s exfactors well. A couple weeks back she was snapped chillin one-on-one with Chris’ former model bang, Draya Michele and some days later K tweeted “kill em with kindness” after it was rumored that she had CB cop Rihanna a bottle when they happened to be at the same club together. All smart moves to me and so smart that they kindled a list I think every girl can learn from. You may think there’s absolutely no reason to be cool with your dude’s past tryster, but that’s where you’re wrong! Check the benefits of this seemingly bad idea.

Benefit #1: You’ll Feel Much More Comfier With Their Platonic Friendship

Notice how the word platonic wasn’t robed in quotation marks. Taking the time to get to know ‘ol girl (beyond your habit of light Facebook stalking of course), should tame any leftover queasiness you have regarding her agenda. This is about shifting your perspective so that she becomes a person and not a person who smanged your boyfriend. Plusss, playing nice will serve as a sweet and subtle reminder to her that YOU own the lever to this man’s dick. Sorry, ex girl.

Benefit #2: You’ll Score Dope Girl Points From Your Man

And they will be redeemable for wonderful treasures like elongated cunnilingus and such. Not to mention, a heartier grasp of trust. Most men are expecting bouts of awkward silence between a former and a current, so if you manage not to channel Issa Rae at a meet and greet, he’ll never forget it.

Benefit #3: She Can Give You Better Insight Into Him

For some strange reason I always felt a kinship with my high school lover’s ex-girlfriend. Real weird. He shared some tales about her that made me chuckle and when I saw her photo, chick just looked like someone I rolled with. Since he claimed to speak highly of me to her, I decided to just shoot her a Facebook message saying hi. And from there we got chummy and she actually became the best of all confidantes when my relationship began to wilt. Why? Because she’s been there, done that. I’m not suggesting to introduce yourself than run down your twenty-one questions, BUT if you do feel a genuine connection to homegirl, consider honing it and cashing in when the going gets tough.

Benefit #4: Makes Planning A Threesome Way Easier!

Hey, at least he’d know how to please you both #atthesamedamntime. Just kidding, don’t ever do this unless you’re a professional polyamorist.

Feeling better now, eh? I triple dog dare ya ass to tell me why this is still a bad idea!

Until then, thank me later kids,

T. (@itstracyg| @WWMDtv)


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  1. So cute! Loved this… #4… iDied! lolll

    pinkpantiesandleopardlipstick, 2 years ago Reply

  2. I loved your list! You opened my eyes because before reading this I just thought Karrueche was a fool who just didn't know how to put her foot down.

    Mariah, 2 years ago Reply

    • I do, in fact, still think she's foolish, but for staying with someone who clearly has too much unfinished business elsewhere. It's different to be friends with her, but you're getting into intense fights in the club about her… say what now? No deals!

      Ashley White, 2 years ago Reply

      • I completely agree! He was fighting over her! If I was Karrueche, I would be so annoyed with him but I feel like since Chris is the 'famous' one, she has like no control over her relationship smh…she probably doesn't want to risk losing him. Even the "girl, I been missing that body" on the birthday cake song was inappropriate! I hope she has talked to him about how inappropriate his behavior is and how stupid he is making her look.

        Mariah, 2 years ago Reply

  3. I think your right, Karrueche is on to something. She is making herself seem like the ideal, relaxed girlfriend by befriending Chris Brown's exes. I also think its always good to try to be cordial with them but its a difficult situation because they may try take your man, especially in Karrueche's place.

    Whit, 2 years ago Reply

  4. Hell no!

    sunshyne84, 1 year ago Reply

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